#Tanuki Brat;;FREEDOM IS THE ONLY OUTCOME| |Levi

[thesealovesme]

@necroarchy​ HOWLED: How much more must you lose due to your weakness before you do something about it.

| |The sea I so loved, she rejects me, she rejects me!:; 

OH, STUPID CHILD,                 DID YOU EVER STOP TO CONSIDER YOU DESERVE REJECTION?     Of course he had - and survival was his penance. For all those foolish enough to save his worthless hide, he had brought naught but disappointment, despair and death.    For his Beloved, he proved an ungrateful, selfish brat, cursing her name until she finally CURSED HIM BACK.   And for his benefactor, he that took in a feral stray, he had first left and proved NOTHING, only to return and fail utterly in the single task given to him. He was no guardian, so why pretend as such? Those he had tried to protect, those whose past bumped hard against his, all he had managed to do for them was sink a few boats. For her who brought his mind back from the brink, well, the depths had taken her just the same, the dangling charm at his throat his only parting gift.         He still couldn’t read, and in his haste to defend she that smelled so like the sea, she had witnessed the cause for his epithet. There was a break in the film reel, and his expression shredded itself into frame, razor gold sinking into an ocean of white as jaws parted, a sudden swell of rage drizzling out just as soon as it reared.

                     “.. what... what th’ hell am I supposed te’ go an’ do about it?            Get stronger? That what ye’ want me to say?                   Ain’t this what bein’ a pirate is about?      The freedom ta’ fuck up whenever ye’ want? ..hau hau hau.... HAAUU HAU HAU!!                                                  THAT’S RIGHT, THAT’S HOW IT BE!          Everything, then! How about that for an answer?                      Until the tide takes me and returns me to my Beloved,                                          I don’t feel like changing a thing!“

[thesealovesme]

Continued from - [[ 🐺 ]] @l-promised-him

| |The sea I so loved, she rejects me, she rejects me!:;

            It wasn’t as though he had assumed normalcy - his survival... was something assured, it always always assured that nothing on this waterlogged rock could hope to take his existence... so the fact his revival happened to be a bit chaotic, and he had been so very close to passing those gates into a more fiery realm... was not the reason that the ashen-maned beast currently gazed towards nothing, using the bottle resting idly on the cushion beside him as an excuse for his state.                      Just what had he howled into the night, and who had been there to listen?         He knew the little Tanuki had been by his side the entire ordeal, he would not speak openly unless, in his blinded and boiling fatigue, smell tea, the forest and various wildflowers.. ..               He remembered shouts of Godhood, rambling apologies...as his shattering psyche desperately attempted to grasp pieces of itself close to the chest, so they wouldn’t scatter into the wind, or burn beneath the flames that seemed to be consuming his flesh. Most of them were of recent bonds, a light touch to that little charm that hung from his neck would solidify that in his delirium, he hadn’t forgotten... .. some of his raving was lamentations of a child hunted in the night, tired of pain and hunger, hoisting his burdens onto a deity he claimed to love with all his heart...                 .... but was that the only faith he spouted? Small flashes of a hand covered in rich earthly bangles, gingerly caressing an unscarred youth’s face as though he was her most important possession... an enormous aquarium filled with life - he wasn’t a God.                            He didn’t create any of that.             He hadn’t created anything.   But those on this vessel who had known suffering, would cringe at the use of that verbal tic... had he betrayed them, with his existence, as well?                   The little Dove with the sad eyes and hair the colour of the sea during the day.. he tended to ignore his existence, in an almost nervous manner, for he never wanted to be looked upon like one of them... .. what if that damned crazy gardener.... ever had a look of disdain when she saw him, now?     He’d get irritable, he’d have no recourse, he would rage, if he was rejected... but that would only prove something, wouldn’t it?  The bastard himself waltzed past him, distantly, and he opened his mouth as though his mind wasn’t a tumult of contradictions.                              “S’nice view, but ye’ look like shit, Tanuki-kozou.”               

  The storm-eyed elder tensed and flared, and an inferno raged toward him - causing at first, those pinpoints of tourmaline to flash a beast’s uncertain reproach.             His heckles raised, outwardly, but the ashen monstrosity’s eyes were lethargic, now, an acceptance of despair dulling that normally hell-bent gold.. and he made no move to halt the relentless grip at his clavicle.        ... it was true then... the tension wasn’t just his own... he had said too much.. even if he himself had no claims to the past, anymore - he could leave, then - he should just leave them, if his presence was triggering.. even the handsome racoon had issues with it. I don’t want to leave.             (Where are we going, Haha-hue, eh?)                               I like these little shits.        (Is it because I spoke of the sea, again, Chichi-hue, eh?)                                    It’s because I fucked up, again -                 “Seems a little severe, fer’ no harm don - n n.” That rumble escalated as the few nerves that reigned over a dulled body revved to life upon such harsh contact with his hair - it felt nice, he wouldn’t have complained, otherwise.. if this had simply been based on his incessant advances.          But the former soldier was leaning in, as though poised to devour him whole, and he decided that perhaps, if that would continue to give him a place, he’d let it occur. The reciprocation was heated, experienced in conveying each and every need, and every way he knew how to explain ‘love’, the way he knew it - all-encompassing, forever accepting.. if just in a kiss, Levi would know that blissful ache.          A calloused hand was raised by instinct, ghosting the material covering a toned shoulder, but refusing to touch, even while crimson marks burned gently at his nape... it just felt good. It felt like someone was there.                And he could feel them, see them.. hear them. The kiss was broken, and he almost leaned in to chase the warmth, only pausing as soon as feather-light tones reached his heightened perceptions.                A hellish scaffold came into view, his expression the dawn to a nightmare, the shadows of night still apparent in those tired eyes - his grin was confusion, and hopeful relief, and he looked u pon Levi as though he was seeing a ship in the distance, after having been stranded for days.

                           “Do ye’ think it’s fine, then, that m’not  a God?”                                          

                 (Do you think it’s fine, then, that I’m not a God, eh?)

                                                                             ;;Take me then, it’s where I belong, the sea, sea,                                                                                                        by the wrathful God of the sea.|